Friday, July 1, 2011

Telling others how PROUD you are of them is most important and we all need to hear it....

We are all born with the basic need to feel loved and accepted. One of the ways in which we show each other our fondness is by telling them how proud we are of them. We need to hear such things from our friends, peers, loved ones, and most of all, our parents (or caregivers). The act of telling your children how proud you are of them is one of the many fundamental building blocks of a healthy self image.

In order for us to feel good about who we are (and in turn feel good about those we choose to surround ourselves with) we must feel a sense of worth and importance. This positive self image is then perpetuated by the way in which we treat others as well as ourselves. If someone expresses that they really never care about how others feel about them, or that they don't require approval of any kind, they are not being truthful with you and most importantly, are lying to themselves. They are in denial and therefore, at times, can seem cold and unaffected.

If we are not nurtured with prideful caregivers, this leaves us forever seeking approval in others, often at our own expense. We then become victims and travel in the same dysfunctional circle for a lifetime, never finding the peace within ourselves to know that we are important and that we can accomplish great things; always wondering why we are not good enough and why life is so unfair. When a parent neglects their child in this way, they feel either consciously or subconsciously a sense of emptiness or a void. Until they are able to revisit and resolve their parents/care giver's shameful behavior and come to realize that the rejection they have felt had nothing to do with them but with the caregivers themselves, they will not have inner peace.

I share this subject today, with you, dear reader, for I was inspired (yesterday) by some one very special and important to me who has gone out of their way to show me this type of acceptance over the past few weeks. And for this, I am truly grateful. My hope for you is to help free you up of any old negative preconceptions about your worthiness and abilities.

We all have many accomplishments to be proud of. These accomplishments need not be monumental. They could be as simple as just getting through a rough day, not loosing your temper, helping out a dear friend, finishing a project on time, or smiling when you feel like crying. You should be proud of yourself each and every day. You should also say the words out loud: "I am very proud of you!" to those who deserve it, when it is appropriate and true.  These kind words should mean as much to you as to the recipient. Now, watch their face light up with delight!

Be Proud. Be Happy. Be True.