Sunday, July 3, 2011

Family far and away........

Growing up in the northeast, I moved around a lot, but always lived within a 50 mile radius of my very large family. This made them all very accessible at all times and therefore a constant part of my life, until the the age of 18 when we (my immediate family) all packed up and moved across the country. Waiting for us in Arizona were a few family members that had moved there a couple of years back. For the next 15 years or so, I stayed in Arizona, far away from the bulk of my family members. It was an adjustment at first, but as time went by, it became my new norm.

Married with a toddler and pregnant with my second child, my husband and I decided to take the position offered to him in Texas by his current employer at the time. He went ahead of us, and after my son was born, me and the kids met him there and stayed for 4 years. After that, he was offered another position in the Mid-Atlantic, across the country; and off we went.

I was done with the desert and longed to be back east. This is where I wanted to raise my kids. This is were I felt they would thrive and this was the place that I wanted to call home forever more. 11 years later, we are still here and I am grateful every day. It was one of the best decisions for my little family.

I share this with you, dear reader, so that you know where I am coming from when I speak to the many issues faced when living far away from your family. Making these choices to leave your loved ones is never an easy one. I have based my own decisions to move by what I thought would be best for my family. If that meant having to move away, then so be it.

My children have never known what it is like to be raised in a large family. They have never had the experience of playing with all of their cousins. Nor have they had the opportunity to be able to go the Grandma and Grandpa's whenever they wanted. They do not know the joy of great family gatherings during the holidays or the fun of an impromptu visit from aunts and uncles.

The fact that they have not been able to experience the love and closeness that comes with being surrounded by family makes me sad for them. They know no different, but I do. They have not suffered a loss, but I know what could have been. With all this being said, I still feel that these decisions were the right ones. The fact that they have thrived, regardless of the absence of extended family, is proof that is was.

I want to let you know, dear reader, that if you have to or have made the choice to move away from family that it will be alright. You will adjust and can start a new chapter in your life with a relocation away from your loved ones without any guilt. If you choose to move for the betterment of your family's quality of life, let no one guilt you into staying. You must do what is best for you and your family. If those around you love you, in a true and selfless way, they will let you go and not try and selfishly hold you back. (I know that there are extenuating circumstances to these statements, but for this post, I must generalize)

The other motivator for writing this post today is the current situation many are finding themselves in due to the poor economy. We all know someone, if not ourselves, who is suffering with financial difficulties. During these unfortunate times, we are having to make the most difficult choices. In some instances, one of them could be the decision to have to move their family far and away from their loved ones in order to either keep their current job or find a new one. If this is the case, I want you to know that even though these moves are difficult, you will find peace of mind in the end. I want you to have faith that you and your family can get through this life change. I want you to hold out hope for the brighter future that awaits your family, even though it may take you away from those you love.

Please remember that once you and another person are close at heart, you are forever close souls. No matter how far apart you may reside from each other, your love has no boundaries and your soul does not know space and time. You are forever bonded. You are always near and dear to those that matter most, no matter how close you live to each other or how far.

I wish you well. I wish you success. I wish you peace of mind.